Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Seriously .. how many ppl ard mi hve actually accept whom i am ? i too suffered under this b4 .. though not sure am i still tis way .. but i knw i grew up to knw tht some things is gd and to take ... let go if unnecessary ... frm now onwards tht is ...
i am not a kid .. i do knw of wht my actions led to and wht are the consequences ..
i may behave like a kiddo at times .. threw tantrums or lose control of my emotions ..
but tht is oni my low EQ ... i do not hve a low IQ .. thus with tht i knw who i am .. and wht i do ... wht i say .. and wht i dun wan to say or where do i express my thots at ...
if anyone in my life is afraid of wht i am goin to say ... please say so .. please dun beat ard the bush for i dislike doin so ... unless i am hostile or wary of an individual , otherwise most of the time i dun beat ard the bush ... dun go abt 1 whole round but yet ur initial motive is juz so simple .. i am not pin pting to any1 .. i am juz stating it to everyone .. in any case any1 might feel sensitive about it ..
i dun lose myself ... i grow up to be myself ... my ex hated mi sayin tht .. i am me this sentence ..
but actually wht i really meant was to embrace my real thots and not disguise wht i really feel and thot ... is it hard ... even though i might like some1 .. doesnt mean i will listen to tht particular some1 or even do whtever they say .. i behave wht i can and should .. and do not do wht i tink i dun wan to even if he/she say she dun like it ... coz i dun wan to deceive them nor decieve myself of my real thots .... too frank of a person might hve hurt others and myself .. i might land myself into trouble ... but still i invited them .. so i wouldnt regret ... i wouldnt regret wht i hve done b4 .. coz without tht, i will not be who i am now ... my thots and actions will not hve changed ... within hlf a yr .. i lost a lot and also gained a lot .. so i couldnt say i dun like it .. i juz hve to accept it .. juz hopin ppl will accept whom i am ... and i too learnt to accept wht they are ... i am learnin to accept the person tht i liked to be reserved .. but yet in a way , i really hope he/she would accept wht i am ...
[ - 雯'§ - ]
penning down @
2/22/2005 02:34:00 AM
sans amour .. mir ist einsam.....