Thursday, September 30, 2004
Was on the bus today while comin back from my shift ...

thot of something .... thot of wht cin said to me ..
tht nite i asked her wht is her requirements for her boyfriend ..
she said some stuffs tht i chose not to say here ....
and i asked her wht does she tink abt my requirements for boyfriends
she said to me tht " tht guy must like u 1st than you thot of being a relationship with tht guy "

when i thot of it now ... i have to totally agree on tht ...
coz for all the past relationship .. it seems as that guy thot me that he liked me .. then i will consider my feelings ... so no matter how much i do like a guy, i will never say it out ( erm actually i did once .. but tht was through email .. and the funnie thing is it was my lecturer .. but he is so freaking cute and nerdy .. my type )
but it is not tht once a guy say he like mi, i will deffo accept the relationship .. NO NO
i did reject 3 guys before ... coz two of them are too boring for my type .. another one was too ahbeng ~! ... yawnzzz ...

but wht i really was tinkin was tht am i tht passive .. and not active ..
i mean i am quite a out-spoken person as in i express my distaste in a second and can be a bitch .. but yet in terms of feelings ... i am yet another side of being reserved ...
juz another pt to discuss about with being reserved ..
i realise i never like to discuss initimate issues or thoughts with my loved ones ...
it seems like whenever i am in a relationship, when i have thoughts i wouldnt say it out ... but yet demand the other party to ...y so ? and yet it is not gd .. coz it always end up ruinin my relationship, as when i keep it to myself, my temper get irritated easily ... and again ...

well ... i guess tht is wht we call self-reflection den

[ - 雯'§ - ] penning down @ 9/30/2004 08:13:00 PM


sans amour .. mir ist einsam.....

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